Growing up, whenever I wanted to go to a party my mom ALWAYS asked, “Where’s your invitation?” Any response from me other than, “here”….. meant I was staying home.
“If they wanted you there they would have invited you,” she’d say.
“But I’m going with friend.”
“If they wanted you there they would have invited you.”
After twenty some years I began to apply this concept to my life and relationships.
In some relationships, I was the one that called more, that texted more, that always initiated outings or events, was always trying to keep the peace. I just always seemed to be the one that kept the relationship going.
And then I began to think…if they wanted me there, in their life they would invite me.
If they wanted me there they wouldn’t kill me with their words, they wouldn’t hurt me with their actions.
If they wanted me in their life, they’d make me feel invited.
They would have invited me.
So. I stopped. I stopped inviting myself into people’s lives. If they wanted me there they’d invite me.
If they didn’t want to be a part of my journey I stopped dragging them.
At first it was hard. I was scared, wondering if I’d reacted the correct way. And then I began to notice changes. Peaceful changes. I felt relief. I began to feel light.
Now, I wait. Wait to see if I’ll be invited. Sometimes I am. Sometimes I’m not.
Now, I make sure I’m inviting. To those I want in my life I make sure they feel welcome. I make sure they know they have a space and it’s here whenever they need it.
Some invitations I don’t accept if I feel they’re not right for me at that moment.
Life is too short to force ourselves into the lives of those that don’t want us there.
If you look, I’m sure you’ll find those out there that want you in their life and you won’t have to question it, there will be no doubts about it.
Just don’t forget, you have to be inviting too.
Even when you know what you know, You Don’t Know The Half!